Like other Carnegie books, this one is packed with good old-fashioned common sense, illustrated with examples drawn from research on historical figures and interviews with business leaders. Somehow, even the simplest advice-such as Carnegie's four-step method of problem solving-is presented in a way that makes you want to write it down and post it on your board. My favorite tip, one that I have on a yellow post-it above my bed is �If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep�.

For David Posen M.D., specialized in the fields of stress management, lifestyle counselling and psychotherapy, there is a major difference between worry and concern: "Worry is what I choke on; Concern is what I chew on." So, the alternative to worry is not blanking out your mind to matters of importance, but developing a more constructive and organized approach,� he says. He uses an exercise that he calls Creative worrying. For example, if you're worrying about something at bedtime, you might try this exercise before you crawl into bed. Sit down with a pen and paper and answer these four questions in writing:
1. What's the worst thing that can happen? What's my greatest fear?
2. How likely is it to happen? What is the likelihood of this actually occurring?
3. If it does happen, what would I do to handle it? What measures would I take to deal with the problem?
4. What can I do to either prevent it from happening or to prepare for it?
Once you've answered these questions, you now have a game plan to implement if the worst really does occur. File it away and go to bed. There's nothing more that you can do right now. Further worry will add absolutely nothing.
Long distance worrying
Worrying is both a cause and a symptom of stress. It's also a terrible drain on time and energy. Some worrying is normal and inevitable - such as when your teenager is still out two hours after curfew. But some people worry weeks or months in advance. This is a real time-waster - especially since most of the things we worry about never come to pass.
This is similar to borrowing trouble from the future. It's almost as if people are trying to get a head start so they can be miserable for as long as possible.
Some people believe that worrying wards off trouble. Some people�s philosophy is that if they worry about something, then it's not going to happen. Since it's impossible to prove a negative, this can be a difficult notion to dispel.
Posen cites the story of the guy who's snapping his fingers all the time and somebody asks him, "Why are you doing that?"
"To keep the elephants away."
"There are no elephants within kilometres of here."
"See, it works!"
Lately, and with the world recession and the downsizing procedures that companies followed to cut down on expenses, a lot of worrying was about the possibility of job loss either through downsizing, restructuring or merger. People became hyper vigilant to every nuance in the workplace. Any directive or off-hand remark was seen as a potential tip-off about some change in company policy. How many of us spent sleepless nights, or awakened every other hour during their sleep.
I chose to take a "wait and see" approach and not get caught up in speculation and "what ifs." It saved me considerable aggravation.
I've developed a philosophy for dealing with fears and unknowns about the future: "Don't worry about things until you know you have something to worry about." And there's an outcome: "If there is something to worry about, you'll have all the time in the world to worry about it then. You don't have to start early." These mottos have served me and many of my very well over time.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff . . . and it's all small stuff is an inspiring little book that shows you how to keep from letting the little things in life drive you crazy. In thoughtful and insightful language, author Richard Carlson reveals ways to calm down in the midst of your incredibly hurried, stress-filled life. You can learn to put things in perspective by making the small daily changes he suggests, including advice such as "Think of your problems as potential teachers"; "Remember that when you die, your 'in' box won't be empty"; and "Do one thing at a time." You should try to live in the present moment, let others have the glory at times, and lower your tolerance to stress. You can write down your most stubborn positions and see if you can soften them, learn to trust your intuitions, and live each day as if it might be your last. With gentle, supportive suggestions, Dr. Carlson reveals ways to make your actions more peaceful and caring, with the added benefit of making your life more calm and stress-free.
Learn to worry well and benefit from stress
As we all know, worrying creates stress, and stress is a health risk. Worrying can raise your blood pressure, cause you to suffer sleepless nights and affect your digestion, your immunity - even your sex life. But worrying isn't all bad - the ability to worry about possible dangers and prepare for them has been a crucial factor in the development and survival of Mankind. Whether making a business decision, thinking about the kids or raging over a relationship, worrying is useful, but only when it's done well.
Learn to make stress work for you:
1-Turn stress into your friend - understand when to worry
Thousands of years ago worrying ensured our survival. Humans were the feeblest, slowest, most poorly protected food around. 'Man the hunter' is a hopelessly inaccurate idea, as for most of our evolution we survived by spotting dangerous situations and staying well away!

And how did we do that? By worrying! Or put another way; using our thinking ability to explore every possibility before putting ourselves at risk. Possibilities like "There could be a tiger in there", had to be checked out first! These days few situations threaten our physical survival, but we still behave as if there are many. Most of us face many potentially worry-provoking situations every day and if we avoided them all, we'd get nowhere fast.
2-Make worrying constructive - learn how to 'worry well'.
Take time to think over all your worries, dilemmas and problems. Set aside half an hour for worrying during the day. When you find yourself worrying at any other time, note the worry down and keep it for later. Once you write down your worries, you can be more objective, and 'leave them alone' for a while. Try using the following template:
"I am worried about...."
"The worst that could happen is...."
"The best that could happen is...."
"Things I can do now are"....
"Other factors to remember".
Also realise that tiredness, hunger, anxiety and other 'low' mood states can lead to your thoughts becoming more doom-laden. So worry after you've eaten, in the morning after a good sleep, or best of all, after 20 minutes exercise.
3-Take the pressure off yourself - delay making crucial decisions
You may find it hard to think of anything else when you are caught up worrying about some future decision. Realise that sometimes you can choose not to make a decision for the time being. Say to yourself "I'm not ready to make a decision on that yet. I'll think about it again in 5 days time", and put the date in your diary.
Getting yourself too worked up with worry can have a detrimental effect on your mood, sleep patterns, memory and problem-solving ability. Dwelling on a problem can make it harder to find a solution. By giving yourself 'time off' from thinking about it - you'll find you get a greater perspective and find solutions easier. Writing down your worries and putting them aside until you decide to deal with them, allows you to put them to rest for the time being.
4-Worry your way to a solution, not more problems!
Chronic worrying can quickly make you feel helpless, as you imagine more and more problems until you reach the point where you can't possibly solve them all. It usually goes a bit like "If that happens, then this will happen, and then that will be a disaster!"

Instead, try challenging worry-provoking thoughts with questions like "What evidence is there for that?" and "Just how likely is that, based on my past experience?" Learn to distinguish between possibility and probability. It's your mind - take control of your thoughts!

Worrying is about balancing the odds of whether or not to do something. If you have to do it, then what you need is preparation, not worry. For example, with public speaking, prepare intellectually by learning your material, and emotionally by doing relaxation and visualisation, or self-hypnosis.
And just to keep things in perspective, remember the words of the French philosopher, Montaigne: "My life has been a series of catastrophes - most of which never happened." If you're a chronic worrier, review your track record and see that most of the things you worried about didn't happen after all. Also notice that, even when certain things did happen, you usually dealt with them and landed on your feet. That's a helpful reality check.